Twyla's First SCAB - By @twylaliden

By Twyla LidénI did not hit the ground running. I fell flat on my face, rolled around and some how found myself standing and watching everyone pass me. I was behind, way behind. A challenge ahead, just the way I like it. Just the way I need it be. To have that immense fire burning behind my ass, not accepting any excuses. Either I get my shit together or I burn. I know for a fact that my hair does not react well to flames, so I got to doing.I only have a slight idea of what is to come this year and that gives me the same bubbly stomach as I had after trying the sketchy but surprisingly good street food in Peru. I don’t like to be unsure when it comes to my future, or so I thought. But apparently that is what I need to be to get my mind and body out of ”sloth mode” and into ”I CAN DO ANYFUCKINGTHING mode”.There is no such thing as ”I can’t”. There really isn’t. I mean obviously sometimes you shouldn’t, but you still CAN. Like reading ”Your memory, how it works and how to improve it” in 3 days. You really shouldn’t, but you CAN.I am searching my mind for intellectual reflections about life and starting a new chapter etc etc..but I find nothing. It is an empty room. I wish my head was as stuffed with interesting things as my room and my room as empty as my head right now. I am a collector, so you might understand how cleaning out my room is heartbreaking for me. I have every single birthday card I have ever gotten stored away in my crazy collection cabinet. Other things tucked away in there include:

• A piggy bank filled with money that now has expired
• 3 fan letters to Adele that I was too chicken to send
• All the Adele merchandise you could ever imagine
• A baseball signed by my 8th grade boyfriend who said he was going to be famous and that I could make big bucks by selling it later on in life…Still waiting
• An immense amount of dust
• The Declaration of Independence, a very reasonable gift for the foreign exchange student who almost failed social studies
• A pee funnel for girls to be able to pee standing up
• All my darkest secrets

I went through the cabinet in hopes of sorting some things out. That was not a very realistic goal to set up. I ended up reading all my pre AND post pubescent diaries, finding a necklace I was sure my 7th grade BFF had stolen and added another journal from my travels in Peru.So, now I am leaving this room and my cabinet. I have to admit though, that I already checked out some furniture stores around my new flat and have my eye on a couple of beauties just waiting to be filled with my mad memorabilia. I hope my flatmate is just as excited as I am. If not, I will just lock her in there as well.