I Lost The Plot Today by @SW16_Moriarty

By James Morgan It’s weird, because when I went home yesterday it was well and truly stashed in my back pocket andI can even remember putting it there myself. I popped it in a little manila envelope around 4.30, sealed it shut with a timbre-poste and headed offto run around in the rain and kick footballs into Elin's face. So this morning I felt pretty damn good about myself as I swaggered into the studio, patting my arseand smiling over the super awesome mega cool plot I was carrying around. I grabbed a cheeky bageland cup of mud before sashaying over to my partenaire so we could get on with the day. I took outthe plot, popped it on the desk and started chatting about ukuleles, girls’ bums and TED talks.However, this is when the strangest thing started to happen. Every time I looked away, my little plotkept edging further and further towards the edge of the table, like it was trying to do a runner togreener minds. Obviously, I was prepared for this: plots can be mischievous little things, and rarelydo as they’re told, but normally after a couple hours of positive reinforcement they decide to settledown and have a nap underneath the pile of papers from the day before. But today, it just wouldn’t let off. First I had to run across the studio to stop it from jumping out thewindow. Later on, on my way back from the toilet I found it trying to nit off down the stairs, maybeto hang out with Mathew out front. The third and fourth times it was trying to climb into themicrowave, which was very upsetting as surely hanging out with me is better than a radioactiveexplosion… Eventually however, it was gone. I searched all over the place. I looked under the insecurities peoplehave been shrugging off since day one that now sit in a rather cold mound towards the back wall. Iran upstairs to ask Chantelle’s ghost if she’d seen it, but alas she had not. Nor was it hiding behind allthose other clichés I keep in a box by the coat hangers: it was just nowhere to be seen.So if anyone does see it jumping around, or has a spare one that they can lend me until it comesback, I would thoroughly appreciate it.