Back where I left, I was anxious of what to expect. New faces, empty spaces, it’s old but brand new. Searching for the similar from those who came before. I felt guilty, ashamed but I don’t want that anymore.
Week one was shit, I didn’t think I could commit. Been there. Done that. Got the pat on the back. The problem with me is that I get set in my ways. I’m stubborn, complicated and I hate change.
Yea, this is life and that’s just how it goes.
I need to take charge more during my lows. Thoughts overwhelm and try to control, some days are harder and take their toll.
I panicked about what people might think,
I put two and two together and made a false link. I thought you’d all gossip, bitch and moan.
But I couldn’t have been further from that zone.
Week two came and ran away.
But something clicked. I wanted to stay.
Inside I felt like the me I knew back then. Motivated. Happy. Without a defence.
Thank you Fat Penguin and the new intake. You’ve helped me a lot, make no mistake. It’s people like you that keep me alive.
I’ll return the favour as I want us all to thrive.
I’ve decided to stay for the whole year.
The last few days have made it clear.
I’m still fighting and I’m still here.
So why give up now when I have nothing to fear.