By Karolina Kezdi
Love Letter 2.0
I love you. I say it every day, to the dog – who weed all my tea bags, and I left them, and drunk it – to a guy who I met only once, but he brought my dye from my hairdresser, to my cousin – who corrects this scab, to my friends and family before I hang up the phone, but I never tell it to myself.
“Do unto others as you would have them do unto you” – I can’t tell how many times I’ve heard it, but I’m sure people don’t want this from me.
I dare to love them, I want them to feel it, I think it’s important to say out loud. However, I can’t love myself. I’m afraid or what would happen then. I’ve hated myself, I’ve been disgusted by myself, I’ve been angry to myself, I’ve been upset and disappointed with myself, I’ve shamed myself, I’ve felt sorry for myself (ohhh self pity, my guilty pleasure). These are feeling I’m familiar with.
I can also be proud of myself too, I believe in myself, I know I can achieve goals, I can make things, I can change the world, but I shouldn’t be satisfied. This is my fuel. We have so much to do. So dear Me and I, we should agree in a like.
Because like I said, we have so much to do.
Mess is everywhere.
I spent the last three weeks with researching the sexuality of the now 16-24 year olds.
This is what I’ve learnt:
We think about sex all the time. Well, men think about sex every seven seconds, or every 28 minutes (up to you who you trust more, the myth or the Daily Mail). Teens don’t want to think about sex.
They are tense and distressed. This generation is the most well-informed and the most clueless about sex at the same time. They have born into sexual freedom. So many options, too many opinions.
What do I like? What don’t? How can I know, If I never tried?
They have unlimited access from the missionary man to the bit more niche slightly narrow left little toes licking fetish, but zero guidelines on how to select this massive information.
We are surrounded by sex in public, but we don’t talk about sex, due to its private nature. Teens left Facebook many years ago, because Mom and Dad are using it too, but they don’t mind to using the same porn site as their parents.
But the difference is, for teens porn is sex education. That sets them up to fail. All their expectations are false. That makes them upset or nervous when they finally have sex.
They can’t see real sex.
Porn is fake, romantic movies are too perfect, and sexting with filters is also manipulated. They can’t see normal sized or small penises, or boobs, which makes them uncomfortable and causes a huge lack of self-confidence. Porn skips the emotional bits. Still, submassive with woman. Lots of young girls are afraid to say no, even if they don’t enjoy the act. “You own to the guy after he bought two rum and coke for you” – this feeling is familiar to me, but I was sure it was because I’m from Eastern Europe, from a country where even the leader represents the toxic kind of masculinity himself. I was wrong, girls feel the same way in the UK too.
I believe with the bottom of my heart that there are no mistakes in real sex, and my personal mission to teach this to the world.
The copy scores 80.3 in the Flesch Reading Ease test