Late night Studio Scabbing, by @TomEspezel

The Dean bigadminjobs | February 12, 2015

Posted in Blog, Front, Keep

Tom Espezel-Bentley

 

 

 

 

 

 

By Tom Espezel Bentley

 

Beeep Beeeep Beeep.

Im sitting in SCA at 8:12 pm, thinking about what to write for a SCAB.  The studio is eerily empty. Eytan is a few desks away sighing. Nina is roasting marshmallows over a candle. Same old same old.

Beeep Beeeep Beeep.

It’s got to be a good SCAB. That one Larry wrote was great. Fuck. I wish I knew somebody who had died, preferably with an interesting and yet relevant backstory. Maybe I could make it up?

Beeep Beeeep Beeep.

Or maybe I could conjure up a witty anecdote about how my old friends have all abandoned me because of my new found love of spending all my time researching periods. Who needs friends when you have Mumsnet.

Beeep Beeeep Beeep.

Really? I cant think of anything? Perhaps I can work fantasy football in somehow. I waste hours of time talking to James about whether or not he thinks I should take a penalty 4 points to bring in Sanchez. Collecting dots and all that.

Beeep Beeeep Beeep.

I have just changed desks. I wasn’t feeling ‘the flow’ at the last one. Steve and Adam’s desk is pretty nice. What do we have here? Care hand cream that nourishes AND protects? Don’t mind if I do. Thanks boys.

Beeep Beeeep Beeep.

My newly moistened hands are positively gliding over the keyboard. I think I’ve discovered a copywriting secret. I wonder if Dave Trott’s hands are silky smooth? Note to self: shake his hand and find out.

Beeep Beeeep Beeep.

Right nothing’s coming. I may as well just write about this INCREDIBLY ANNOYING BEEPING SOUND THAT BEEN WAILING FROM THE KITCHEN FOR THE PAST 3 HOURS. How can anyone write a SCAB under these conditions?