By Anam Kibria
Break Up Letter
Dear Comfort Zone,
This is something that I’ve been meaning to get off my chest for a while know. As you know, I’ve always been a jack of all trades, never really taking the time to master anything once I felt I was comfortable with my grasp on the subject. Given an opportunity to do something, I’ve always opted to try something new as opposed to honing my collected skills. This didn’t help at all when it came time to choose a passion project to work on.
I felt paralysed. Everything interested me and excited me but I was scared. Scared to commit to just one idea.
I realised how many fears crept into our relationship, comfort zone. Fear to choose my project, fear to start the project. Fear to finish the project, fear to submit it. Fear to write a scab. Fear to start SCA, fear to have all my work judged and criticized. Fear of having too many ideas and fear of not having enough.
You, being the caring being that you are, harboured these feelings for me and nurtured them. Bless your heart, you thought you were doing what’s best for me and for us.
Then this I stumbled across this little golden nugget, and it reminded me of what life used to be like before you changed:
“Anything worthwhile doing is worthwhile doing lousy. If it wasn’t worthwhile doing, you shouldn’t have done it at all. On the other hand, if it is worthwhile doing and you wait until you can do it perfectly, if you procrastinate, you run the risk of not doing it. Ever.”
I realised how much this relationship was suffocating me. I’ve decided to stop being scared and waiting to start things only once I felt confident enough to do so. Hopefully my efforts this coming year won’t be considered “lousy”.
It’s not you, it’s me. We had a beautiful run this past year, but now its time for me to move on to bigger and better things. I wish you the best.